To be perfectly honest, I don't understand how my self works most of the time.
I thought I had this figured out. I thought I knew what I wanted, where we stood, and all that jazz.
But tonight... Maybe I'm just homesick, nostasglic, lonely... I don't know what it is to be honest but I find myself wanting to be with there more than anything at this moment. Maybe it's because when I'm home they've always been there in some sense. Maybe just being so cut off from constant communication with them has finally gotten to me. I miss the reliability, the consistency.
I don't know what it is that's put my head in this 180 tailspin of 'What ifs' and 'Why nots'.
How do I know what I feel if I've never felt it before?
I hardly noticed Valentine's Day this year. Not only in the sense that it told me I'm not in a relationship, but it's also the day I found out about my dad's cancer. Usually I hate it more than anything for both reasons. This year...didn't even care. Progress or regression?
Words sit on the tip of my tongue, but how do I mean them? Do I mean them on the surface or in a much deeper meaning?
I might just be scared to throw caution to the wind. I may just be being stupid and tomorrow none of this will matter.
Just know I miss you. More than you miss me. Trust me.
It has been a country music kind of night, in a lot of ways. Carrie Underwood gets it (or at least her songwriters do) and so do Rascal Flatts.
Love, it can weather any storm
Bring you back to being born, again
Oh, it's the helping hand
When you needed it most
The lightouse shining on the coast
That never goes dim
When your heart is full of doubt
As you think that there's no way out
Rascal Flatts - Unstoppable
They take one last drive around town
And man it
Already looks different
He bangs the wheel and says
'Life ain't fair
And this growing up stuff man I don't know
I just don't wanna let you go'
Carrie Underwood - The Night Before (Life Goes On)
I thought about calling you when I got off the plane
Every time I see this city through the clouds I get that way
Call me crazy for missing you like this but I do
Rascal Flatts - Then I Did
I know there's a blue horizon,
Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,
Getting there means leaving things behind,
Sometimes life's so bitter sweet.
Carrie Underwood - Starts with Goodbye
I woke up this morning
With this feeling inside me that I can't explain
Like a weight that I've carried
Been carried away, away
But I know something is coming
I don't know what it is
But I know it's amazing, you save me
My time is coming
And I'll find my way out of this longest drought
Rascal Flatts - Feels Like Today
It's so easy to get lost inside
A problem that seems so big at the time
It's like a river thats so wide
It swallows you whole
While you sit around thinking about what you can't change
And worrying about all the wrong things
Time's flying by, moving so fast
You better make it count 'cause you can't get it back
Carrie Underwood - So Small
I'm gonna stop lookin' back and start movin' on
And learn how to face my fears
Love with all of my heart, make my mark
I wanna leave something here
Go out on a ledge, with out any net
That's what I'm gonna be about
Yeah I wanna be runnin'
When the sand runs out
Rascal Flatts - When the Sand Runs Out
There's once in a lifetime
And there's once in a while
And the difference between the two is about a million miles
Oh, you might get lucky while the moon is looking up
But in the truth of the morning, the stars will be long gone
Carrie Underwood - You Won't Find This
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you stand, then you stand
Rascal Flatts - Stand
Suppose I called you up tonight
And told you that I love you
And suppose I said I wanna come back home
And suppose I cried and said I think I finally learned my lesson
And I'm tired of spending all my time alone
If I told you that I realize you're all I ever wanted
And it's killing me to be so far away
Would you tell me that you love me to
And when we cry together
Would you simply laugh at me and say...
I told you so
Carrie Underwood - I Told You So
What do I do now that you're gone?
No back up plan, no second chance
And no one else to blame
All I can hear in the silence that remains
Are the words I couldnt say
Rascal Flatts - Words I Couldn't Say
It's twisted, messed up
And the more I think about it
It's crazy, but so what
I may never understand it
I'm caught up and I'm hanging on
I'm gonna love you even if it's wrong
Carrie Underwood - Twisted
Sometimes two hearts
Just can't dance to the same beat
So I'll pack up my things
And I'll take what remains of me
Rascal Flatts - Winner at a Losing Game
Maybe it's the way that the stars are aligned
That's makin' me feel this way tonight
Maybe it's the words you left unsaid
Maybe it's the stardust in my hand
Carrie Underwood - This Time
I come around all broken down and
Crowded out
And you're comfort
Sometimes the place I go
Is so deep and dark and desperate
I don't know, I don't know
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life
Rascal Flatts - Every Day
And you should know, please believe me
I've picked up the phone a thousand times
And tried to dial your number
But it's been so long, it's never easy
It's like trying to spin the world the other way
What can I say?
Carrie Underwood - What Can I Say
Give all you've got
Like it's your last day
Your heart and soul
Before it's too late
And pull them in so close
Enough that they can feel it
With every single breath that
You're breathing
Breathe it in again and again
Love who you love
With all that you have
And don't waste the time
That flies so fast
Love who you love
And say that you do
Hold on as tight as they'll let you
Love who you love
Hold on, hold on
Rascal Flatts - Love Who You Love
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